http://scoutnabout.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] scoutnabout.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] nike_ravus 2010-01-16 06:07 pm (UTC)

I like the direction that you went with this. (Sorry that you haven't been feeling well, I hope that you're okay and feeling better)
Just a few parts I found myself unsure of who's 'voice' I was 'hearing' until I reached the end of the paragraph. In this quote,

“'I should go', she said, starting to rise off the bed.

Emily stopped her, then climbed easily into her lap and pinned her to the bed."

I thought that you might have meant Emma, but I could be wrong?

Thanks for writing as always! :D

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